The elephant in the room here is that I haven’t blogged in three months, but I won’t waste time apologizing or explaining so that we can move on to the good stuff, which is an update!
Our dossier (the big, fat file of paperwork) went to China at the end of December (DTC). I think we set an agency record for the speed of our home study + the speed a which everything went through. China accepted our file and logged us into their system on January 8th (LID). Again, things that were supposed to take 3-4 weeks happened in a matter of days. Next up: matching. This refers to the time when we receive a file on a child who is up for adoption, spend 24 hours deciding whether or not this is our child, and if we decide yes it is, to then begin the process to bring him home.
Now here is where it gets a little wonky. When we started this process last summer, we expected that we were embarking on a 12-18 month journey from applying to our agency to travelling to China. We knew that we had a trip to Kenya planned in August 2018, and we figured that this trip would just sortof fit into our long process. In no way did we expect to be ready to match with our son five months after starting the paperwork, in January 2018. And once we match, travel happens two or three months later. I panicked a little, knowing that the Kenya trip was a definite, but so was bringing home our son. (We also knew it would not be an option to adopt him before the trip and take him for lots of different reasons).
Our wonderful social worker set us at ease when she told us that we could go on an unofficial hold for a few months. She would not pass us any files yet (files=waiting children who fit our parameters), but nothing would change between us and the Chinese government. She, too, was amazed by the speed at which all the paperwork went through and told us that since we are bringing home a boy, it is possible that we will match quickly. Fun fact: 80% of Americans adopting from China want girls. This option set our minds very much at ease, and we agreed that we will come off hold in June, meaning we will then be available to receive files. Our original intention to bring home Oliver in Fall 2018 is still what we are hoping for and “planning” around. I can’t wait to see how this delay will be a part of our story.
In no way does this mean we have changed our minds about adopting, nor are we any less eager to have him home with us. We are trusting in a sovereign God and in the knowledge that we can’t miss our son, or that our son will go to someone else. We didn’t miss the perfect file in February. Someone isn’t going to scoop up his file on May 19. We have spent the last few months fundraising and applying for grants, as well as lots and lots of praying. We pray for Oliver each night as a family and regularly bring him into the conversation (or the kids do). We’ve talked to them about how he’s growing in each one of our hearts right now, not in my tummy, and we pray for him as he unknowingly prepares to become a part of a big, loud house full of crazy. We have fielded a lot of questions from them, some sweet, some practical, and some just plain weird. We received a grant from the Show Hope Foundation that will help to cover the next installment of money we owe. Yay! Several sweet friends have hosted fundraisers for us that will also help with the chunk o’money we have left to pay.
And on to the practical part:
-Please keep praying for us as we prepare for Oliver and to become a family of six. Obviously each time we’ve grown our family it has been a big adjustment, but there are so many unknown factors here it’s challenging to not constantly try to anticipate or make contingency plans, or to try and figure out holidays or when we are going to need off from work, how each kid will react, etc. Guarding our hearts and minds and staying rooted in our faith has been very important during this season.
-For financial provision to cover the remaining costs that come with matching plus travel costs. For a number of different reasons, which I will outline in a future post, we would like to travel as a whole family, which obviously brings our costs up (plus ups the crazy factor exponentially, ha). We have an account on Adopt Together and may do some more specific fundraisers once we know what his sweet face looks like/as we get closer to time.
-For our trip to Kenya. We are verrrrrrry excited and thankful that my grandmother is taking her children/grandchildren/great-grandchildren on a safari to Kenya this summer, and we want to really enjoy our last (big) hurrah as a family of five. We are also going to get to visit one of the kids we sponsor through Compassion, which is really exciting, too.
Thanks for reading and being a part of our lives!
Team Grooms 